...in which our ironic ‘hero’ converts his desperate hopes into an onion-style satire
in a move that has considerably wrong-footed the international community, India and Pakistan moved in for a long, passionate kiss, friday evening - scotching weeks of speculation the two were moving toward an altercation.
Afghanistan, a long-time associate of Pakistan, said that ze was as surprised as anyone by this latest development - "i mean, i always knew Stan had this thing for India but the way they've been recently, i thought that was off the agenda for good." ze added, "you should have seen my face - i was like - ze's going for tongues!" Bangladesh and China, who were also nearby at the time, were similarly taken aback.
during ther exchange, which lasted for seventeen minutes, all told - India apparently cupped Pakistan's left buttock, while Pakistan responded by making affirmative noises and pushing hard against India's chest.
unconfirmed reports claim ze then muttered something dirty in urdu.